In sickness and in health. A vow made between husband and wife when they declare their love for one another in front of the people they love. A vow between husband and wife to be there for each other whether they’re sick or healthy- a promise to love at all times.
I have never in my life known what this phrase meant in a personal aspect because I have never been married, but Abba showed it to me in the most beautiful yet stressful week of my life. through covid.
that’s right. I tested positive for covid. I, along with 14 of my squadmates tested positive Friday, November 13th- 6 days after I got back from Louisiana (a blog about that experience coming soon !!).
so how did Abba reveal to me how this phrase applied to me in my life, in this season?
through my loss of taste.
I lost my sense of taste the Wednesday before I tested positive- hinting that there was a high chance I had contracted covid, and I didn’t realize how hard and upsetting it is to live without that sense until then. I was absolutely devastated. not lying, I at first, was a little mad at God for doing that, but then I realized my heart posture towards Abba right after and realized that He is still good. I sat there for maybe 10 minutes and told Him why it hurt me and why I was upset. While He let me sit there upset, He comforted me. He gave me a new heart posture towards the situation- to find the beauty in the ashes. It took 4 days until I realized what he wanted me to realize.
I wrote this down in my journal after listening to the song Closer by Maverick City Music.
“your love is so much sweeter, than anything I’ve tasted”
taste. a sense humans live on. a sense that brings us comfort. a sense we don’t know how to live without.
this is exactly how I feel about my relationship with Abba.
His love is beyond sweeter than anything I have tasted. He is someone I cannot live without. He is the one who brings me the most comfort. the only thing that can bring me true comfort. not food, not television, not people… only Him. And I get the privilege to experience Him as my only source of comfort because I can’t turn to the sweetness or savoriness of food.
so in sickness, He loves me. in health, He loves and I Him.
when my squad contracted covid and moved to the annex house, He didn’t bring us there and then drop us, no. He was there in every conversation, every laugh, every tear, every meal, every worship time, every moment- He was there. He didn’t leave me when I was upset and sad. He sat there and comforted me saying “my love is sufficient for you. my love sustains you. I’m here for you.”
What a sweet Father we serve that even when I was upset at Him, He let me sit there and be mad and cry, then He quickly changed my heart and opened my eyes to the situation and what could happen that week if only I would trust Him and His ways.
and what a sweet sweet week that was. I had some of the sweetest conversations. I talked with people on my squad I typically didn’t talk to. I laughed until my belly hurt. I laughed until tears rolled down my face. I cried with friends who gave me a shoulder to cry on. I got to experience Abba in a new way through His beloved children. I got to truly experience and know Him as comforter.
much love,
gracie <3
